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balthazar
Title: A love story [chapter 11/?]
Authors: kimisgirl (wrote Cas and Sam) and doubledgedsword (wrote Dean)
Pairing: Castiel/Dean
Rating/Warnings: PG13 this part
Summary: Dean knows it's a dream, he knows its not real.... so why does it feel like it means more, and more importantly, why does he wish it was more? And, why, for that matter, does Castiel show up the next moring with a hikey on his neck and angry as hell? If it's not real why does the angel know everything that happened... like he was there?

Disclaimer: None of the supernatural characters or storylines belong to us :( -sad face-



Castiel reappeared in the hotel room just behind Sam and his eyes feel immediately on Dean. His expression unreadable as he took in the sight of the man for the first time since this thing had started when he knew it was over. That it was just them now, no more dreams or succubus' no more of Dean being so tired he needed Cas' help to sleep, to heal. And for a small moment Castiel was overwhelmed by the fear that Dean might not want or need him now he could be healthy and dreamless again.

He pushed the fear away, it was silly, Dean loved him, Castiel knew that and now finally they could be together just the two of them.... And then his eyes feel on Sam. He was saying something, Castiel hadn't understood what he was talking about and he gave the back of Sam's head a confused look before looking back at Dean. The annoyed look on Dean's face was enough to tell Cas that what ever Sam was saying he didn't like. Not if it made Dean look like that. Though he could still see traces of humour in Dean's face, which only served to confuse him more.

"Would you like me to smite him?" he asked Dean softly with a raised eyebrow as he took a step toward the back of Sam. He would have liked nothing more than to send Sam somewhere that wasn't here and have Dean all to himself but he would not do it unless Dean told him it was ok. All he knew was that if he didn't get Dean alone soon he would not be held responsible for his actions when he finally did manage.

He couldn't help finally but smile at Dean, it lit up his face and told the man that everything was ok, that Cas was fine and that the bitch had been dealt with. He took a step toward Dean and stopped. He was still new at this and wasn't sure yet if he was always allowed to touch Dean the way he wanted to or if it would annoy him. So he held back as always and waited to see if Dean would come to him....

************************************


"Oh, of course you're gonna make a fuss, Sammy," Dean said idly. "Cos I'm gonna tell you one of the many reasons why I love him. He pulled me out of Hell. I've still got the mark from that on my arm, and I hope it never goes away. When I'm with him, it's like the memory of that place is wiped away, and you remember what I told you before. There is no forgetting Hell or making it better, but somehow... somehow Cas can stop it. He makes things quiet up here," he said, his voice low and serious and filled with emotion. He touched his hand briefly to his forehead, and then looked up at Sam. "Even before I knew I was in love, he helped to make that shit go away. He saw me at my very worst, and he still thought I deserved to be saved. Now you try and tell me that's not love, Sam, cos in my book that's it."

He went quiet then, and finally grinned when Sam mentioned Bobby. "I'll think about that one," he said dryly.

There was a rush of wind, a flutter of wings, and Dean saw the one person he had been dying to see standing between him and Sam.

"Cas," Dean said, and got to his feet.

He looked from Sam to Cas and said, mischief in his voice, "Oh, I'd love to see that, Cas. He's been giving me crap pretty much since the moment you left, but it was all to make sure I stayed awake. You can make him sleep, if you want though?"

He smiled widely and strode towards Cas, not giving a flying crap about Sammy being in the room, and caught him in a bear hug. His smile had told him straight away that they had nothing to worry about any more, and Dean was relieved. He could sleep without fear, now, and he would get his strength back, bit by bit. He held Cas tightly and whispered, "Thank you." It was all he needed to say. It was thanking him for stopping the succubus, thanking him for coming back to him, and thanking him for every other wonderful thing he had ever done for him and Dean had neglected to show him gratitude for.

********************************************


The smile feel slowly off Sam's face as he listened to Dean talk, his brother had never once opened up to him like he just had. And yet it was said in a way that would have made him smile at how Dean it was if it hadn't been for the seriousness and emotion in his brother voice. Sam could see now just what the angel truly meant to his brother. And he knew it wasn't something that Dean was just going to get over in a few months and be back to chasing all the tail he could find. Dean was really truly in love and Sam was pretty damned sure it wasn't going anywhere any time soon.

"Yeah, yeah, sounds like it is to me Dean" he agreed quietly as he nodded and took another mouthful of beer. Which he almost choked on AGAIN! "Damn it Cas, would you stop making me choke, anyone would think you're trying to kill me today!" he snapped as he turned his head to look at the angel annoyed. He'd jumped (hence the choking) when Castiel had spoken from behind him. Sam hadn't even heard him come in, he was paying to much attention to what Dean had said.

"Oh wow, yeah thanks dude..." He said to Dean with a hurt puppy look. "And putting me to sleep is SO not going to be necessary, cause this..." he pointed with his finger as he stood up, indicating Dean and Cas, who were once again wrapped around each other, "... is not something I plan on staying around for, I'm gonna go get another room.... far away from this one as I can"

He grinned and shook his head... "Still think it's funny you're sleeping with a dude man." He couldn't help but crack as he laughed and grabbed his things. "Good to see you back Cas" He added as he glanced at them one last time and all but ran from the room for the night.

*********************************


He grinned as Dean stood up and came to him, a breath of relief at finally having Dean close to him again escaping his lips. He wrapped both arms tight around Dean and pulled him close, his head buried in his neck as he let the man's presence wash over him. He still couldn't believe how much more real he felt to him now. He had thought the dreams had been real, the feel, the touch, the smell, but he'd been wrong. The real Dean was so much more to him than he'd been before.

"You're welcome" He muttered into Dean's neck before lifting his head and moving back just a little so he could look at Sam. He smiled at the man and nodded to Dean. "Fine, I won't smite him then..." he left the disappointment unsaid but his tone told the story. Not that he would have actually smote Sam, he just would have sent him somewhere far away that would leave him and Dean alone for the night.

He couldn't help but smile at Dean when Sam told them he was going to get his own room and he almost wanted to thank Sam but stopped himself as he watched the young man leave the room.

As soon as he and Dean were alone, a strange shyness seemed to fall on him and he took a step back from Dean and just watched him. He knew it was stupid but it almost felt like that first night all over again and he was nervous all of a sudden.

He rose his eyes to look at Dean quietly. "She will never be able to harm you again" He said quietly and all the emotion he'd felt over the past day came flooding out in his voice. And all that was left was over whelming joy that Dean was safe, even if he was still angry with himself for letting Dean get so badly hurt in the first place. He could have stopped the whole thing weeks ago if he'd not been so selfish and had pulled Dean out of the dreams that first night. He'd known then that these dreams hadn't been right. That something was toying with them. He should have saved Dean from them back then. He had wanted so badly thought to be with Dean he had let himself ignore what should have been done.

"Dean I'm so sorry I didn't fix this sooner... I should have, but I was being selfish, I just wanted to be with you so badly. Spending every night with you... it made me so happy, I've never been happy before Dean and I didn't want to lose it, lose you... I'm so sorry" He whispered in a gut wrenching sound. He still couldn't believe he'd put Dean at risk just so he could be happy....

********************************


Dean smiled brokenly at Sam, unused to showing so much emotion... and equally unused to having it just accepted rather than mocked. He laughed off the embarrassment and rubbed the back of his neck. "Thanks, Sam," he said quietly. Again, he wasn't just thanking him for one thing. He was thanking him for understanding, and for giving them some privacy.

He waited until Sam was gone, and raised his eyebrows when Cas stepped away from him, wondering why as soon as they had some alone time he was backing away from him. He smiled as Cas started to speak, and just listened until he seemed to run out of steam. He clearly needed to get that off his chest, and Dean didn't want to rush him. Tonight would be the first real night together, and he would actually get to wake up with his angel beside him (providing he didn't have to zap off somewhere for some reason or other), and Dean wanted to relish this. The dreams has always felt rushed, urgent and needy. Tonight, he knew he was in love, and he wanted to show that to Cas.

"Hey..." Dean said at length, and closed the small distance between them. He took Castiel's hands in his and stroked them, soothing his pain. "Hey, you didn't hear me cryin' out for them to stop until yesterday, did you? That hell-bitch may have tried to kill me, but she gave me something much better. She gave me you... she forced me to realise how much I loved you, and even though I hate her, I feel grateful, you know?" He shrugged, not sure if he was getting what he meant across accurately.

"You and me, we're gonna be happy from now on. We can have every night together, even if it means we have to sleep in the car so Sam can have a break. Don't be sad, precious, it worked out for the best. That skank thought she was hurting us, but she helped us. You're not losing me, I swear..." he trailed off, and kissed Castiel's forehead softly, stopping only to move lower and kiss his eyes, his cheeks, his nose and finally his lips. "I love you, Castiel, and I'm not going nowhere without you."

He felt so happy to have his angel back and safe. He could have hugged Naamah for the inadvertent good deed she had done them, he really could. He cradled Castiel's face in his hands and sighed. "Sam called you my boyfriend. What do you make of that?" he asked, just to shake him out of his upset. Dean didn't hold it against him. He had been doing the exact same thing night after night, and he didn't care. He had his angel, and that was all that mattered. He was all that mattered...

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Castiel felt suddenly calm when Dean stepped closer closing the gap between them. It was the type of calm he had always gotten when he returned home to heaven from earth. Like everything was right again and nothing bad could break through. He gripped Dean's hands when the man took his and laced his fingers through them only letting go when Dean needed them back to move then to Castiel's face. Cas lent into the touch and closed his eyes, just letting the feeling of Dean's hands on his cheeks seep into his skin. They were warm and more calloused in reality than they had been in the dream. The rough strength of them making Castiel shiver. He wanted to take Dean's hands in his own and run his fingers over ever inch of them. Explore the callous' the lines, the rise and fall of the curves. Kiss along his knuckles before sucking each finger into his mouth and watching Dean's beautiful eyes light up with lust for him.

He breathed softly and slowly as Dean began to talk and he opened his eyes so he could watch as he listened. Dean so close his breath was warm and gently on Castiel's skin. Dean's words touched him deeper than he'd ever been touch and he felt suddenly safe and warm and he nodded slightly jerkily because he was so full of emotion that the small action of nodding his head became hard to remember how to do.

"You really love me enough that going through all this has been worth it?" He asked his voice thick with emotion as he stared at Dean. "I..." he bowed his head and drew in a deep breath before looking up and continuing ".... you don't know how much that means to me Dean" he whispered softly. "I love you so much and knowing you feel the same even out of the dreams..."

He stopped talking the moment Dean's lips met with his forehead softly, his eyes fluttering shut and a softly moan leaving his mouth as Dean continued to kiss his face. Castiel's hands round there way to Dean's chest and rested heavily on it, his thumbs tracing small circles through the fabric of his shirt. When Dean's lips finally met his he gently kissed him back and the feeling and taste of Dean again made him swoon. He balled his fists up in Dean's shirt and pulled him closer, deepening the kiss, running his tongue lightly over Dean's upper lip begging for entrance, which he was granted as he felt Dean's mouth open for him. He pressed himself close against Dean's body and kissed him like he'd never wanted to kiss anything so badly in his life. Because, well he never had.

When Dean pulled back Cas was shaking with passion and his eyes burnt bright as he looked at Dean in a way that really would have made Sam freak. Dean was still cradling his face with his hands and Cas pressed his cheek into the touch as Dean asked him what he thought about being called his boyfriend. Castiel was familiar with the term and what it meant and something in his gut fluttered at the thought that Dean might want to call him that, but he had said Sam had said it not Dean. So he wasn't about to get to excited.

"Your boyfriend?" He asked quietly and tried to decide how to answer. "I... " he paused. "I know I love you and I only want to be with you, is that what it means to be someone's boyfriend?"

He looked up at Dean and his ever present innocence was at play again not fully understanding what it might mean if he were Dean's boyfriend, but fairly certain he wanted to be anyway. "What do you make of it?" He asked quietly, wanting to know how Dean felt about something like that.

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Dean sighed softly. He felt unbelievably happy standing there with his angel. When he compared the dreams to this moment, this felt natural and wonderful, while the dreams felt unreal and almost fevered. There was no hazy feeling to this situation, no confusion. He felt safe and loved when he was with Cas, and it was the single most wonderful thing in their relationship in his opinion. He felt complete when he was with him.

He nodded, just once and said quietly, "Yup. Every bit of it was worth it, and I'd have gone through worse for you. Imagine how pissed off Naamah will be when she realises she actually did some good for us!" He laughed then, the thought of the bitch's face when she realised thoroughly entertaining him. He smiled at him again, and said, "Of course I feel the same. The dreams just made me realise how I felt for you."

Castiel's skin tasted like incense, salt and something completely unrecognisable to Dean. It was something distinctly him, and he shivered as the taste flooded his mouth. The moment Castiel's hands touched his chest, Dean felt as though he had stuck his finger into a live socket and had a jolt of electricity pass through him. It was so like the first time they had touched in the dreams, but the difference was how pure this felt. He moaned when Cas pulled him closer, and kissed him back so hard he thought his lips would bruise.

The kiss broke all too soon, and he felt himself hardening when he met Castiel's eyes and saw the unclouded lust there. "Cas, I need you or I think I'm going to explode," he said, his voice husky and his eyes locked onto the angel's. "But I only want this if you do... I don't want you to do anything you'll regret." He trailed his hands down Castiel's body and over his abdomen towards his belt buckle, pausing there and going no further. He kissed him again, his teeth pulling Castiel's lower lip into his mouth and sucking it lightly.

Dean thought for a moment and grinned. "I don't think 'boyfriend' suits you," he admitted. "I can't think of a word that fits you properly, but for now... boyfriend will do." He pulled him close and said, "You're the only one I want. I love you, Cas. Being someone's boyfriend means you love them and you want to be with them, so I think we're covered there."

********************************


"I do not understand?" Castiel said confused again, looking up at Dean his head turned to the side like a puppy who wasn't sure if it was in trouble or not. "You do not wish me to be your boyfriend?" He asked, he had no idea what Dean meant when he said the word didn't suit Castiel. In his head that meant clearly that Dean didn't want him to be his boyfriend. That while he loved him and wanted him in his bed, he didn't want to be with him in a normal relationship like other humans do. Castiel couldn't keep the disappointment off his face, even though it made sense in the end he told himself. Because no matter how much he tried to tell himself otherwise, he couldn't be normal as far as humans went, because he wasn't human.

He looked at Dean then though when the man told him he loved him and wanted him and he decided right then that if that was what Dean wanted then that would be enough for him. Hell that was everything, who really cared what labels were or weren't put to it. "I love you too angel" He murmured and kissed Dean softly.


The look Castiel gave Dean right then was one that clearly said that if Dean even thought of not continuing the journey his hands had started down his chest and stomach, he would be forced to do very unpleasant things to punish Dean. "You honestly think I would ever not want to be with you Dean?" He growled quietly, his voice full of hoarse lust. He pressed his hips into Dean's hands on his belt buckle and raised an eyebrow at him, the corner of his mouth curling up into a smirk...

His own hands were still balled in Dean's shirt at his chest and he slowly uncurled one and pressed if flat against Dean's chest over his heart and kneaded his muscles gently as his eyes searched the man's face like he was making a map of it in his mind. Every rise and fall, every hair, every freckle, the exact colour of his eyes, the way his lips parted as he breathed out harshly when Castiel dug his fingers in deep. The way Dean's lips looked after he had ran his lips over them subconsciously while he looked back at Cas. Everything, remembering, imprinting, loving.

"You are the most amazing person I've ever known Dean Winchester" He whispered quietly, his eyes finishing there study of Dean's lips and locking on his eyes. The hand over Dean's heart gently moved to run a finger over the collar of Dean's t-shirt, running over the hot skin slowly, he was in no mood to rush any of this, he wanted to take his time and do everything he'd always wanted but had never felt like he had the time to in the dreams. He followed the collar of the dark blue shirt with his finger, tracing along it and finishing at the beginnings of Dean's neck. His eyes moved now to follow his finger as he ran it up along Dean's throat, stopping for a moment over his pulse, enjoying the feeling of Dean's blood pumping under his finger.

"This time Dean, we do it all" He said as his eyes flicked back up to Dean's and he grinned wickedly.

*************************


Dean could have kicked himself then. The wounded puppy look in Castiel's eyes assaulted his heart, and he cursed his own lack of tact and sensitivity. He kissed the angel's lips softly and whispered against him, "Sorry, Cas... I didn't explain myself well enough. What I meant to say is that you're so amazing that the word "boyfriend" doesn't seem to do you justice. I need a bigger, better word than that for you, because you're far more than just my boyfriend."

He hoped that Cas would realise what he was getting at. He loved him so much that he couldn't find the words to express it. His language was action, and emotions were hard for him to verbalise. He just knew that "boyfriend" being used to describe just what exactly Cas was to him, meant to him, was like someone saying his Impala was just a car.

He grinned then, and slowly undid Castiel's belt. He felt his heartrate increasing rapidly the longer he held the angel's gaze, and his cheeks were tinged with a pink flush at the thoughts he was having. He didn't think of the dreams as real any more, not now he knew the sick thing that was behind them. He viewed this as their first real time together, and he was nervous again, but it was good nervous. He swallowed a lump of anxiety in his throat and gently removed the blue tie Cas never seemed to be without.

"Well, that time you shoved me against a wall, I thought that you wanted me," Dean said, his tone teasing. "But I told myself I was losing it. Were you carrying a torch for me even back then?" He unbuttoned Castiel's shirt, taking his time. He wasn't going to rip it open tonight... not when he was pretty sure that Cas had no other clothes. And while the thought of Cas borrowing one of his shirts so he wouldn't be completely naked while he was off doing angel-y type things made him smile, he liked the holy tax accountant look he had going on for him.

"You're so god-damned gorgeous..." Dean hissed, and ran his hand along the angel's now exposed chest. He moved slowly, learning every inch of muscle, sinew and flesh all over again. The dream had been decaf, and this was three sugars, no cream, all black espresso. He would have laughed at the way his mind was explaining things for him, all cars and coffee metaphors. He was surprised he hadn't compared anything to pie yet.

He looked at Cas, and had to bite down an urge to make a self-deprecating joke about how the angel couldn't have known very many people if that was the case. Cas believed in him. He was going to try to do the same. He stroked along Castiel's cheek, his hand moving into his hair and running through it. Soft, dark and product free. Dean wondered briefly how he managed to make it look like he had been driving on a motorbike with no helmet with no gel. Castiel's gentle touch made him shudder with sudden desire. He could almost feel his heartbeat leaping under his finger.

"That's exactly what I needed to hear..." Dean growled. With that, he leaned down and kissed along Castiel's jawline, up as far as his ear, where he paused only to suck the lobe, and then slowly down his throat until he got to the place he knew would make the angel's knees buckle. The hickey he had made on their first night had faded away in the three weeks since. That wouldn't do at all. He licked Castiel's throat and began to suck on the skin. This was his angel, and he was marking him. No hell bitch was ever going to try digging her filthy claws into him again.

********************************


Castiel gave Dean a silly smile that showed how happy he was about what Dean had just told him but he didn't have a clue how to let him know other than to smile stupidly at him and pull closer to him. "I understand, thank you Dean" He murmured with his lips pressed softly to Dean's cheek. The stubble tickling his lips and making him breath a little faster. "Whether it's big enough or not I still like to hear you say it" He murmured with a blush. Having the only human who had ever really meant anything to him call him something as personal as 'boyfriend'... yeah that really made the angel happy. Even if what Dean had said had made sense, he felt the same way, he didn't know the right words for how he felt for Dean either, not in any language Dean would understand or be able to hear at any rate.

He watched his finger as he moved it from Dean's pulse and pushed his fingers up into Dean's hair slowly. He loved the soft spikiness of it and it made him happy just to be able to do that to Dean. He had never even let himself acknowledge what he was feeling for Dean before the dreams because he had known the man would never let him do this, let him touch him, love him. So he had denied it all, for so long, he hadn't even realised just how long he'd been denying it until right now. He realised as he stood, his fingers curled in Dean's shirt on one hand and running through his hair with the other, just how long he'd loved Dean. It almost felt like he'd never not loved him.

"Did you like when I did that Dean?" He asked with a playful grin as he searched Dean's eyes for the truth. He hadn't really needed to throw Dean against that wall and press himself to him to stop him making a noise, he could have just appeared in front of him a finger pressed to his lips to show him he needed him to be quiet. He had wanted the contact with Dean though he realised now. "I did want you then, I just didn't realise what it was at the time."

He moaned softly when he felt Dean's fingers running down his naked chest and his eyes moved from Dean to look at the strong fingers pressed against his skin. His breath hitched at the sight of it and he gave a prayer of thanks that they had all night alone and if they wanted it, even the morning too. And yes, even he saw the irony of praying in thanks for that. He was so sure though that his father would not see a love as pure as theirs as a sin though that it felt ok to the angel. Praying for this love seemed natural.

"Dean" he started as he looked up again and pressed a soft kiss to his lips. "Will you help me, will you show me how to use the shower?" He knew this would probably seem strange to Dean, Castiel not needing to shower to stay clean and all. However, the hand that was scrunched in Dean's shirt still was there for a reason, locked and unmoving, it was the hand he'd had to use to touch the demon. And it felt dirty and unholy. The lingering trace of her on his skin and he didn't, he couldn't, touch Dean the way he wanted to with that feeling on him. He just couldn't. And he decided that like water was used for baptism he could bless the water in the shower and use it to cleanse the evil from him. And he wanted Dean there with him, because right now Dean was the most holy, good thing he had left in his life.

"I had to, to seal the deal" He started to explain, not even realising he'd left out what he'd had to do, he was finding it hard to even talk about it it disturbed him so much. "I feel unholy and dirty, need to wash it away... please Dean" He looked up into Dean's face hoping the man wouldn't shy away from him when he knew he'd had to touch that demon. He knew Dean hated her and right now Castiel felt tainted, unworthy of holding on to Dean, he knew it was stupid, but he was an angel and evil touched him differently than it did most. More deeply, it was like a poison that he didn't know how to handle.

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"See that right there, that smile? I love that smile," Dean said. "I want to see more of it." He meant it. There was something so wonderful about that smile on Castiel's normally stoic face, possibly because Dean realised that he was possibly the only human in the world who had ever seen it. This may just have been a vessel for Cas, but it was still him smiling, and he was smiling because Dean had just made him happy. "I just wish I had a better word for you..." Dean whispered. "Something that says just how much I love you."

He made a soft "Mmm..." of pleasure and closed his eyes when Cas started playing with his hair. He loved the feeling of someone at his hair, even though he didn't have much of it. It was such a personal thing to do, to touch somebody's hair, and Dean was more than willing for Cas to do it. He opened his eyes then, and grinned.

"Well, at the time I was a bit freaked out, especially when you pulled out a knife and sliced your arm... but it was pretty hot, I have to say," Dean admitted. "The way you looked at me that day gave me shivers," he added, and blushed, because he had never admitted that out loud to anyone before then. At the time, he had ignored that feeling, put it down to adrenaline, and fear. Now he knew better. He smiled even more widely.

"Shower?" He pinched Castiel's skin lightly as he caressed it, enjoying the quiet moans coming from him as he touched him. "Kinky, but okay... We can try the shower if you like." He completely misunderstood the angel's request. Dean ran his hands back up the angel's chest and tried to push it from his shoulders, but he noticed that Cas wasn't moving his hands so he could take the shirt off him. He looked at him, confused, and froze where he stood when he started to speak.

"Seal the deal?" Dean asked. "Cas, you didn't... you didn't make some deal with that hell bitch so she'd leave me alone. So what, she leaves me alone, but she gets to drag you to the Pit in a year's time, is that it? Please don't tell me you did that, precious, please..." His voice was filled with pain. He thought that Cas had made some horrible bargain in order to keep him safe, and then he realised that Cas said he wanted to wash it away. Dean looked at Cas, shock written all over his features. "You kissed her?" he asked in a small voice. He knew that was a necessary part of making deals, but the thought of that jumped-up skank kissing his angel made him want to beat the crap out of something. Preferably the jumped-up skank in question.

He didn't move away from the angel. He stayed close to him, but his face told the story of his emotions better than he could - hurt, worry, and more than a bit of anger that the succubus had touched his beloved. He wasn't angry with Cas, he was angry with the bitch. So much for being grateful to her earlier... now he wished that she'd make a repeat appearance so he could punch her until he couldn't lift his hand again

**************************************


Cas' smile faded as he saw the worry and anger pass over Dean's face and he struggled with himself for a moment. He wasn't sure if Dean was angry at him for making sure the demon couldn't hurt him any more. He listened to Dean and shook his head firmly. "No, Dean..." he took Dean's face in his clean hand and made sure he was looking at him. "No, she doesn't get me not now not ever, there was a deal, it was as follows. She leaves you alone, forever, never harms you again and I allowed her to live. That is the only deal I was willing to make Dean. I promise you, besides, hell cannot hold an angel of the Lord. Even a rebelled one, not if they still have their grace. I pulled you out didn't I?" He gave Dean a gently smile again and kissed him.

"Don't be worried angel, please, I'm not going anywhere and she will never hurt you again." He kissed him and tried not to look to disgusted at the memory of having to touch the she-bitch. He shook his head again. "No I would not kiss her, she tried to get me to, I stuck my sword against her throat and told her to shake on it or I kill her" He growled at the memory and finally released Dean's shirt, holding his hand up like it was contaminated. "If I'd have kissed her I am not sure I'd ever have been able to kiss you again. I would feel like I was tainted far to deeply" He shuddered at the thought and dropped his hand to his side letting Dean remove his shirt. His eyes locking on Dean's, "You're not angry with me are you?" He whispered. It had been the only way to save Dean, but if he was angry at him Cas wouldn't know how to make it better...

"Please Dean... don't be angry" He looked with big round puppy dog eyes full of worry. He had once again misread Dean's expression, he didn't realise it was meant for her not Castiel. So he stood feeling suddenly exposed and scared, waiting for Dean to either yell at him or tell him he forgave him.

"I need to wash her away" he almost sobbed now, he was getting desperate to get the evil off him. In the past he would have returned to heaven and it would have been cleansed off him as soon as he arrived. He couldn't do that any longer, but he was sure that if Dean would help him and he could wash in holy water, he would feel clean again.. He hoped he could, he would never forgive the demon if she had tainted him for the rest of his life.

**********************************


"Good... good!" Dean said, relieved that he wouldn't have to lose Cas so soon. He wasn't sure what to say other than that, so he kissed him softly. "I just... I thought you had made a deal, like the deal I made for Sam... I didn't want to think that our time together would be limited to a year." For several heartbeats, Dean's mind had flashed with the horror of thinking he would lose Cas, and a sickening feeling that his angel would end up in Hell, with no hope of rescue. He had been there, he knew firsthand the torments that Hell could concoct, and he also knew that if they managed to drag down an angel who still had their grace that they would pull out all the stops and get really creative with their particular brand of evil. Once Cas had assured him that wouldn't happen, he felt the panic leave him, and he sighed with relief.

His eyes widened at Castiel's explanation, and he laughed. "Cas, have I ever told you that you're awesome? Because you are. You're awesome." The thought of the succubus demanding a kiss, and of Cas just threatening her in reply, amused the fuck outta him. He wished he could have seen the expression on her fugly face when she realised Cas had got the drop on her, and had not only beaten her, but had added insult to injury by refusing the customary kiss. He smiled widely and shook his head, pushing off Castiel's shirt finally.

"I'm glad you didn't kiss her..." Dean confessed, and groaned when Cas made the puppy eyes. "Aw man!" he muttered. "First Sam, and now you. Puppy eyes are gonna screw me over time and again." He was a sucker for those eyes. He would have thought that they wouldn't affect him so much, seeing as Sam used them so many times when they were growing up, and STILL used them to this day... but Castiel's kicked puppy expression caught him by the heart and made him want to do anything he requested just so he wouldn't ever look that sad again.

He kissed Cas, wanting to soothe him. "I'm not angry, baby, I promise... I was angry with her for trying to make you kiss her, that's all." He pulled him close, and kissed him again and again, desperate to wash the look off Castiel's face.

He grasped the offending hand gently, and raised it up so he could examine it. "Looks fine to me," Dean said softly, and pressed his lips to the palm. He then kissed each fingertip, looking Castiel in the eye as he did so. He wanted him to know that he didn't consider him tainted by the demon's touch. He was his angel, and no handshake with a succubus was going to change that for him. "Come on, Cas, let's get you into the shower," he said softly, and still holding his hand led him to the bathroom.


******************************


Master Post

TBC

Comments are love :D next chapter up as soon as folks let me know what they thought of this one lol. Need to know when y'all are ready for the next part!

Comments

( 11 comments — Leave a comment )
wolfrider89
Dec. 8th, 2009 10:56 pm (UTC)
Yay! New post! Happy, happy, happy! lol
Loved how cute Cas was here, and how he used his puppy look. Puppy looks is the shit. ;) I can totally see him with that look. It's so cute! (Yes, I am a bit obsessed about that look. How could I not be?)
Sam being all understanding and leaving them alone was great. And how it felt like their first time was also great. And the tainted discussion was awesome, and how Dean kissed Cas' hand!
Um, yes, I kind of liked this chapter. A little bit. Maybe. Ah, who am I kidding? I LOVED it. ;) Please post more!
kimisgirl
Dec. 8th, 2009 11:05 pm (UTC)
lol Yay, so glad you loved it! I agree with all you've said, it was a sweet chapter I think! And Dean kissing Cas' hand was HOT yes lol.

Will post more soon I promise
doubledgedsword
Dec. 8th, 2009 11:46 pm (UTC)
Hurrah! This story just keeps going and going. Do you guys like it so far?

Lulu
(who writes Dean and Naamah!)
kimisgirl
Dec. 8th, 2009 11:56 pm (UTC)
*glomps* Ohai! Fancy seeing you here *hugs*
paranoid_woman
Dec. 9th, 2009 01:35 am (UTC)
Awww, they trust each other so much... I can't take this much cuteness, lol. And still sooo sexy. The words, the touches, the sensations. All so well explained! :D
kimisgirl
Dec. 9th, 2009 10:56 pm (UTC)
aww thanks so much! Glad you're still enjoying it! We aim to please!
ilovedoyle
Dec. 9th, 2009 09:58 pm (UTC)
dude , this just gets cuter and cuter!

No roll on the smut!
kimisgirl
Dec. 9th, 2009 10:57 pm (UTC)
Yay, thank ! more soon I promise! And it's gonna get HOT in here!
uwalumni2
Dec. 10th, 2009 06:00 am (UTC)
Yahoo!!!! A new chapter! **twirls!** So love reading about Cas/Dean! I am so ready for these two to get together outside of the dream :D **grins!**
heavenlyxbodies
Jan. 16th, 2010 01:29 am (UTC)
Okay, it was ALLLLLLL wonderful, but this line
He pressed his hips into Dean's hands on his belt buckle and raised an eyebrow at him, the corner of his mouth curling up into a smirk...
just about killed me 'cause I suddenly got the image of Misha!smirk in full technicolour in my head! *flail* There is something equal parts sexy and disturbing about Cas having a Misha!smirk... *returns to her flailing*

Gods, Cas being all worried and freaked by demon cooties was just tooo precious and heart rending (hence the making light of demon cooties- when in doubt use humour, lol).

Edited at 2010-01-16 01:29 am (UTC)
(Deleted comment)
kimisgirl
Mar. 23rd, 2010 07:46 am (UTC)
Hiya, would like to take a look at your fiction, but the link doesn't seem to have worked, can you leave it for me again? Thanks love
( 11 comments — Leave a comment )